Starbuck’s Baristas

This is not even a freaking career choice. It’s just marketing gone wild. Bad enough that I have to pay a 500% mark-up on a cup of black coffee. I refuse to go along with the notion that these pretentious clowns are actually engaged in a legitimate profession. You’re not a java engineer. You’re a truck-stop waitress who listens to lesbian indie rock through tinny speakers and the unheard cries of peasant farmers who would be better off growing cocaine.