You’re not poor unless you went to school sporting someone else’s jeans with a patched knee and a coat that was either two sizes too small or so big your mom (that crazy bitch) tried to make you and your brother wear it at the same time. Forget fashion and style. A poor kid’s clothes are...

Do me a favor Mr. senior executive.  Avoid belching forth the phase, “I don’t mean to steal Jackson’s thunder, but…” Let’s face it. That’s exactly what you intended to do. Don’t get me wrong. I get it. You’re out of touch, ill informed and about as productive as a...

Ever since that crotchety, old “Jack”-off endorsed the concept, organizations across the globe have been using this tool to dissect the relative performance contributions of their employees.  It’s a reasonable idea. After all, companies routinely appraise their other assets. Why not do...

My brother Nick is a good kid, but sharp as a watermelon sometimes. The other day he approached me for some interviewing advice. As a junior in college he wanted to transition from his longtime kitchen position at the local Italian joint to something more office oriented.  I reviewed his...

As a kid, I remember rolling into the grocery store on food stamp day with a fistful of Monopoly money, thinking I was the shit. It only took one or two trips to realize that being in an alcohol-induced coma was not the only reason my parents gave me the chore. Food stamps are...

            You’ve seen these acrobatically inclined ass bandits hawking everything from model homes to coffee bar grand openings. How does your career go so far into the shitter that you not only take this job, but get so good at it that the boys down at Ringling Brothers conference...